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Those of you who know me at all are probably already sick of hearing about this.  September 1st for me is the beginning of Fall.  It’s not that I can’t wait for Summer to be over, I just can’t wait to get a move on with the Autumn.  Living in Southern California, it’s technically “Summer” here about 10 1/2 months out of the year.  So, we Californians must set our own personal boundaries regarding the seasons.  Mine is, with a bullet, September 1st, Autumn is here.  Maybe August 31st sometimes.

Either way, not to be a big corporate shill, but Starbucks usually sets the Autumn tone for me.  As far as big corporations go, you can’t get better than Starbucks.  They are environmentally conscious, were one of the first companies to offer full gay partner benefits (and haven’t been inconsistent with it like some places–Target–), they take good care of their employees, the coffee bean farmers get wonderful treatment, and employees even get 401k plans and excellent health coverage.

Plus, Pumpkin Spice!!!

Pumpkin Lattes can be enjoyed immediately, but there are many other possibilities at your disposal with this Fall onset that you might not be aware of:

*Pumpkin Steamers. It’s the latte without the espresso.  A Pumpkin Hot Cocoa if you will.  Get it with soy, the vanilla fortification lifts the flavor up into the stratosphere!

*Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate. A special brand of Toffee-infused Chocolate, topped with caramel, and yes, Sea Salt.  Gross? Nothing of the sort, you uncultured swine!  The salt mixed with the chocolate and caramel makes it taste like a chocolate-covered pretzel.  Still unswayed?  More for me, then.  Enjoy your lifetime of cheese pizzas and PB&J’s with the crusts cut off.

*Spiced Cider. Yes, yes, it’s too hot for this.  Get it over ice!  Delicious!

*Pumpkin Scones. I once saw an actress on set blow her Krakatoa stacks because a store ran out of Pumpkin scones.

*Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffins.  The pumpkin muffin has a gooey center of sweet cream cheese.  Don’t be a fucking idiot, okay?  Run out and buy one right now.  Wait, you can’t, because they’re amazing, the stores never stock enough, and they go like fucking hot cakes by 8 AM.  Too sweet for your lilly white, drab diet sensibilities?  Try a slice of pumpkin bread!  Moist and subtly-flavored.

I don’t care if you’re one of these people that hang on to summer like grim death, and refuse to partake in the pumpkin and apple harvest like the rest of us.  You’re getting on this train.  I love summer, too.  Which is why I prefer not to overkill it and witness its descent into dottering old age.  Summer can give itself all the September plastic surgery it wants, the old lady smell is unmaskable.