For Spring Break, Michael and I drove the 15 hours from New York to Chicago, otherwise known as the “Reverse When Harry Met Sally Drive.” It is known as this only in my head. It was a beautiful drive through lots of Pennsylvania
nothingness countryside, and in general, made me feel better about Earth’s growing overpopulation. We have plenty of land to live on should the cities crowd anymore!
It also illuminated me to one more thing: Radio is awful!
Yes, us future dwellers, with our iPods and iPhones, radio is terrible, terrible, terrible. If your car is old, it won’t play your shuffle. If you made Mix CD’s in high school, they are scratched beyond use. And the rumors are true: leave the city limits, and there is nothing but snow, deep country and Christian rock. Even within city limits, you’re not safe. All stations are Top 40 now. And by Top 40, I mean Top 4.
I’m telling you right now, listen to car radio for an hour and you will hear Kelly Clarkson, Rihanna, Maroon 5 and Flo Rida on a loop. I would have cleaned a park statue with my tongue to avoid “Hopeless Place” forever. I used to enjoy “Moves Like Jagger.” Unfortunately, I had heard it five times before crossing the George Washington Bridge, so now hearing it again will trigger me to strangle the nearest living thing. It’s almost enough to make one want to turn off the radio and be left alone with his own thoughts! …Almost.
Why are radio stations committed to playing LMFAO and Pitbull? Those songs are, at best, mindless club pseudobeats. But I’m in a Honda Civic trying to staying awake on Hour 11, while my boyfriend and dog take a nap. It’s not the time nor the place for a Red Bull and vodka, you tweaky goons!
Thank God for Indiana.
Upon entering South Bend limits, a classic rock station emerged. One of the songs that saved me: The Yardbirds’s “Good Morning, Little School Girl.” Today’s LA Playlist…